I’ve done a lot of things alone (off the top of my head): dining out, watching movies, the symphony, going to a bar, the beach, Chicago, Bali…It used to be a test to see how comfortable I could be by placing myself in a potentially uncomfortable situation. And a Friday evening…Alone. With no plans. That was cause for potential self-loathing and criticism.
Never would I have thought that I’d enjoy much less look forward to a solo evening on a Friday night. I finished teaching a class at 7pm and decided to head over to Trader Joe’s and treat myself to a steak and a bottle of Bordeaux. I’m a lightweight…only had 1/3 of the bottle. I’ll probably bring it over to dad’s tomorrow and finish the rest with him–if he’ll have it.
Could I have called up some friends and suggested we get together? Sure. Would I have wanted to be invited out for the night? Why not. But was I seeking company or yearning for it? No.
I think I’ve come to a place in my life where I find comfort in solitude. From “The TAO of Travel” by Paul Theroux a recent acquisition to my library:
“In the best travel books the word “alone” is implied on every exciting page, as subtle and ineradicable as a watermark… Alone, alone: it was like proof of my success. I had had to travel very far to arrive at this solitary condition.”
Who knew that a juicy steak, roasted brussel sprouts, a glass of bordeaux and an after dinner walk with Duke in the neighborhood would not only be sufficient but one of the most perfect ways to end a week?